Oh drama, drama, drama. That is what today was filled with. There are not many things I hate more than seeing those I love get hurt. Actually, I can't really think of anything worse that that. I know everyone has bad days, but no one deserves to have bad days day after day.
Most of the time, it is the petty things in life that make me frustrated with God. I honestly have no reason to be frustrated with God, but I often find that I am. If only I could go back in time... I would tell fifteen year old Janelle, "Chill out. He's got this." There is nothing in this world God can't do. But, I always have to have my own plans for my life that I think are great and will be best for me. God keeps pushing me in His direction and I keep resisting. I am His child. He obviously wants what is best for me. Why should I ever question or resist him? I'm human. That's why.
"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you a hope and a future."
I've finally come to terms with the fact that I do not know what is best for me. God does. End of story. 99% of the stressful things in my life are things that would not be an issue if I was really trying to discern God's will in my life. I know what I want to do and be when I grow up. I've known since I was old enough to carry a baby doll. I've always known. I want to be a mother. I want to be exactly like my mom. I want a home to fill with love, good cooking and babies. I want to raise my children in a strong Christian household -- one that truly puts God first. Not money. Not violence. Not food. God. In order for this dream of mine to become a reality, I need a Godly man.
So... I decided to attend a nice Christian college. Surely God would smack me upside the face with my future husband right? Apparently not. God doesn't change his plans to do what I think is best. But I've realized that if God wants it to happen, it will. It just will. I'm not saying that because I am 19 and single, God is saying that I am not supposed to be a mother. I'm saying that I don't need to worry about it. My life is in his hands. Completely.
I know it's a rather long passage that everyone and their mother knows, but it's such a good reminder.
Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?
And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.
"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you a hope and a future."
--Jeremiah 19:11
I've finally come to terms with the fact that I do not know what is best for me. God does. End of story. 99% of the stressful things in my life are things that would not be an issue if I was really trying to discern God's will in my life. I know what I want to do and be when I grow up. I've known since I was old enough to carry a baby doll. I've always known. I want to be a mother. I want to be exactly like my mom. I want a home to fill with love, good cooking and babies. I want to raise my children in a strong Christian household -- one that truly puts God first. Not money. Not violence. Not food. God. In order for this dream of mine to become a reality, I need a Godly man.
So... I decided to attend a nice Christian college. Surely God would smack me upside the face with my future husband right? Apparently not. God doesn't change his plans to do what I think is best. But I've realized that if God wants it to happen, it will. It just will. I'm not saying that because I am 19 and single, God is saying that I am not supposed to be a mother. I'm saying that I don't need to worry about it. My life is in his hands. Completely.
I know it's a rather long passage that everyone and their mother knows, but it's such a good reminder.
Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?
And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.
--Matthew 6:25-34
i love you. :)
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